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'Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. - <i>Great truths about growing old</i>',
'Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get. - <i>Great truths about growing old</i>',
'When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you are down   there. - <i>Great truths about growing old</i>',
'It is frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.  - <i>Great truths about growing old</i>',
'Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone. - <i>Great truths about growing old</i>',
'Today\'s mighty oak is just yesterday\'s nut that heldd its ground.',
'Laughing is good exercise. It is like jogging on the inside.',
'Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy.',
'Jy kan gee sonder om lief te he, maar jy kan nie liefhê sonder m te gee nie. - - <i>Amy Carmichael</i>',
'As jy vir ander bid, word aan jouself voorsien. - <i>Joodse spreuk</i>',
'God verwarm Sy hande by die hart van \'n biddende. - <i>John Masefiel</i>',
'Werk asof jy honderd jaar gaan word, bid asof jy more sal sterwe. - <i> - Benjamin Franklin</i>',
'Daar is kosbare gedagtes wat ewig is en nooit oud sal word nie. - <i>Cicero</i>',
'Daar is honde wat maar net hoef te knor. Dit is die wat reeds tevore gewys het dat hulle kan byt. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Gedagtes is die gesprek van die siel met homself. - <i>Plato</i>',
'Ons gedagtes is dikwels slegter as watt ons self is. - <i>George Eliot</i>',
'As jy nie goed na jouself omsien nie, sal die Ondernemer die verantwoordelikheid daarvoor oorneem- <i>Carrie Latet</i>',
'Wanneer jy hoofpyn het, ly die hele liggaam daar onder. - <i>Engelse Spreuk</i>',
'There is something in sickness that breaks down the pride of manhood. - <i>Charles Dickens</i>',
'Jou kind sal sy geleerdheid nog by die skool agterlaat; sy opvoeding sal hom vergesel tot in die graf. - <i>C. J Langenhoven</i>',
'Gesondheid is \'n kombinasie van Fisiese, Emosionele en Sosiale Welsyn, en nie  slegs die afwesigheid van \'n siektetoestand of ongesteldheid nie. - <i>World  Health Organization, 1948</i>',
'Ons drink op ander se gesondheid en benadeel ons eie. - <i>Jerome K. Jerome</i>',
'Gesondheid is \'n toestand waar daar totale harmonie is tussen liggaam, siel en gees. Wanneer een daarvan vry is van fisiese gestremdhede en emosionele blokkasies, gaan die poorte van die siel oop. - <i>B.K.S. Iyengar</i>',
'Ek kry soms die gevoel dat die aspirien maatskappye my hoofpyn borg! - <i>V.L.  Allineare</i>',
'From the bitterness of disease man learns the sweetness of health. - <i> Catalane Proverb</i>',

'Hy wat medisyne neem en sy dieet verwaarloos, vermors die vaardigheid van sy dokters. - <i>Chinese Spreekwoord.</i>',
'Geen lewende man sal \'n leeftyd van geluk kan verduur nie; dit sou hel op aarde wees. - <i>George Bernard Shaw</i>',
'Please Leave Your Values At The Front Desk. - <i>Hotel elevator, Paris</i>',
'Order Your Summers Suit. Because Is Big Rush, We Will Execute Customers In Strict Rotation. - <i>Tailor shop, Rhodes</i>',
'Wat buite ons is, het geen verband met geluk nie.. Geluk kom uit die gemoed. -  - <i>Benjamin Franklin</i>',
'Going to church does not make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.',
'Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.',
'If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.',
'Slaap laat solank as jy jou eie baas is en daar sal n tyd kom wanneer n baas jou sal laat vroeg opstaan. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Ons vergeef die skenker nie heeltemal nie. Die hand wat ons voed loop in \'n mate gevaar om gebyt te word. - <i>Ralp waldo Emerson</i>',
'Dit is maklik om redes te bedink waarom ander geduldig moet wee s.- <i>George Eliot</i>',
'Iemand word geken aan die geselskap waaruit hy weg bly.  - <i>A. Craig</i>',
'Die geloof is \'n stok om op te leun, nie om ander mee te slaan  nie.- <i>Laurillard</i>',
'Raad wat nie verander kan word nie, is slegte raad. - <i>Publuis Sirius, Sententiae</i>',
'Die gedienstige engel het gekom in \'n huis waar daar liefde was, en met \'n glimlag omgedraai, en gesê: My diens is hier oorbodig. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Hoe korter jy jou kuier maak, hoe gouer sal jy weer genooi word .- <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Dis makliker om die gemeente lief te hê as jou buurman, en die hele menslike geslag as jou vrou se familie. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Die teëspoed sif die vriende uit wat die voorspoed geoes het. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Wees versigtig wanneer jy Gesondheidsboeke lees, jy kan dalk sterf as gevolg van \'n drukfout! - <i>Mark Twain</i>',
'Borgskap is \'n kind van vriendskap, maar hy vermoor graag sy ou er.- <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Die manteldraaier maak vriende al in die rondte, totdat hy op die end al in die rondte vyande het. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Die ware vriendskap, nou, is nie te koop nie; want vriendskap vind nie sy lus in neem nie, maar in gee. ~ <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Die vriendskap wat jy moet koop is \'n duur artikel. Jy sal nie weer jou prys kry as jy dit van die hand wil sit nie. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.',
'A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.',
'Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.',
'Die hoogtes waartoe grotes gestyg het, is nie plotselling bereik nie. Hul het snags geswoeg, toe ander geslaap het. - <i>Henry Wadsworth Longfellow</i>',
'As mens grafskrifte lees, voel jy ons enigste redding le daarin om die dooies op te wek en die lewendes te begrawe. - <i>Paul Eldridge</i>',
'We Take Your Bags And Send Them In All Directions. - <i>Notice in an Airline ticket office, Copenhagen</i>',
'Ladies Are Requested Not To Have Children In The Bar. - <i>In a Cocktail lounge, Norway.</i>',
'"The Manager Has Personally Passed All The Water Served Here."" - <i>Notice at a Hotel, in Acapulco</i>',
'If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?',

'Iemand wat nie vyande het nie deug nie vir \'n vriend nie. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Moenie jou vriend vergeet nie; dit sal hom seermaak. Maak jou vyand daarmee seer. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Koop jou wingerdstokkies van jou buurman. Jy het nie die vreemde wingerd se druiwe geproe nie. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Waardeer die werk van jou vrou. Jy kan nie op die aarde \'n ander kneg kry vir dieselfde diens en dieselfde prys nie. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Ek was so besig om kanse te soek dat ek my geleenthede een vir een laat verbyglip het. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'My Uncle Lectable was a tailor who had trouble finding <i>suitable</i> customers.',
'After the car rolled over her foot, Eva Lewshun’s leg was <i>tired.</i>',
'Sam Onella’s head ached because it was so <i>thoughtful.</i>',
'Why are doctors only <i>practicing</i> medicine',
'What emerges during an <i>emergency</i>',
'Are you expected to be ambulatory to get to the <i>ambulance</i>',
'Do doctors call a sick client a <i>patient</i> for a reason',
'If the nurse checks your heart rate a second time, are you <i>repulsed</i>',
'What surges during <i>surgery</i>',
'Would you allow an operator to perform an <i>operation</i> on you',
'During a <i>heart attack</i>, is the heart attacking or is it being attacked',
'Why do they use a <i>scalpel</i> when they are not operating on your head',
'Would you not think <i>antibiotics</i> would kill anything biotic',
'When physicians <i>treat</i> you, why do you end up paying',
'Can you look up your other body parts in your <i>appendix</i>',
'Is being <i>uneasy</i> the same as being difficult',
'Exactly what is being covered again in <i>recovery',
'Are doctor’s fees not <i>ill-gotten</i> gains',
'How come having a <i>cold</i> means having a fever',
'Does a nurse have to be artistic to <i>draw</i> blood',
'Is it not odd how the word <i>hospital</i> is related to hospitality',
'The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.',
'Depressie is net woede sonder entosiasme.',
'For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.',
'Hoe kouer die X-traal tafel, hoe groter is die deel van jou liggaam wat daarop moet lê.',
'To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.',
'The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.',
'\'n Skoon gewete is dikwels die teken van \'n slegte geheue.',
'If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you have never tried before.',
'What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck.',
'\'n Brood is meestal vierkantig / langwerpig.  Waarom is die meeste kouevleis rond',
'Rooi vleis is nie sleg vir jou nie. Blou-Groen vleis, Dit is sleg vir jou! - <i>Tommy Smothers</i>',
'Hulle beweer dat rooi vleis sleg is vir jou gesondheid, maar ek het nog nooit een siek tier gesien nie. - <i>Chi Rodriguez</i>',
'Hoekom word ronde pizzas in vierkantige bokse verpak',
'Waarom sê die Engelse ‘I slept like a baby’ as ons almal weet babatjies is elke  twee ure wakker',
'Die pasiënt moet aan die verstand gebring word dat hy of sy beheer oor hulle lewe moet oorneem. Moenie jou liggaam dokter toe neem asof hy \'n werktuigkundige is nie. - <i>Quentin Regestei</i>',
'Diseases of the soul are more dangerous and more numerous than those of the body. - <i>Cicero</i>',
'Wanneer jy gesond is, is jy waarskynlik gelukkig. As jy gesondheid het en gelukkig is, het jy al die rykdom wat jy nodig het - al is dit nie al wat jy wil hê nie. - <i>Elbert Hubbard</i>',
'\'n Lekker lag en \'n lang slaap as die beste geneesmiddel in enige dokter se boek. - <i>Ierse Spreuk</i>',
'Vars lug maak die dokter arm. - <i>Deense Spreuk</i>',

'As \'n dowe ou hof toe gaan, word dit nog \'n verhoor genoem',
'Sommige mense kuier langer in \'n uur as ander in \'n week. - <i>William DeanHowells</i>',
'Ek dank God vir my gebreke, want deur hulle het ek myslf ontdek, my werk, en my God. - <i>Helen Keller.</i>',
'Baie mense spandeer so baie tyd daaraan om hulle gesondheid dop te hou dat hulle nie tyd het om dit te geniet nie. - <i>Josh Billings</i>',
'Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as Bacon! - <i>Doug Larson</i>',
'A man too busy to take care of his health is like a mechanic too busy to take care of his tools.',
'To insure good health: eat lightly, breathe deeply, live moderately, cultivate cheerfulness, and maintain an interest in life.',
'A man’s health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs.',
'Teeth Extracted By The Latest Methodists. - <i>An advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist</i>',

'Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it.',
'Our eyes are placed in front because it is more important to look ahead than look back.',
'Our five senses are incomplete without the sixth - a sense of humor.',
'Real generosity is doing something nice for someone who will never find out.',
' Liefde is nie kunsmatig nie. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.',
'If you tell the truth you do not have to remember anything.',
'Die enigste manier om jou gesondheid te behou, is deur dit te eet wat jy nie wil Henie, dit te drink waarvan jy nie hou nie, dit te doen wat jy nie wil doen nie. - <i>~Mark Twain</i>',
'Good judgment comes from bad experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.',
'The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.',
'Nothing is impossible for those who do not have to do it',
'Generally speaking, you are not learning much when your mouth is moving.',
' Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away and you have their shoes.',
'Never mess up an apology with an excuse.',
'Sorrow looks back, worry looks around, and faith looks up...',
'Standing in the middle of the road is dangerous. You will get knocked down by the traffic from both ways.',
'Words are windows to the heart.',
'A skeptic is a person who, when he sees the handwriting on the wall, claims it is a forgery.',
'The mighty oak tree was once a little nut that held its ground.',
'To forgive is to set the prisoner free, and then discover the prisoner was you.',
'YOU ARE RICHER TODAY IF YOU HAVE LAUGHED, GIVEN OR FORGIVEN.',
'Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.',
' Never lick a steak knife.',
'A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter is not a nice person. - This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails!',
'Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.',
'Die man wat ek na soek, is nie die wat die minste foute maak nie, maar die wat die meeste foute regmaak. ~ <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>',
'Om die luiaard gisteraand nie moeg was nie, het hy vannag nie gerus nie en daarom is hy vanmôre nog lui. - <i>C.J. Langenhoven</i>');

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